Fuzzy Feelings

We once sat together. Talked together. Laughed. But now, there is this wall of awkwardnes between us; there is an essance of cold silence that makes my heart heavy with melancholy.

I am confused. What happens when friendship fails?

She once suggested that maybe friendship is a thing that comes and goes. Maybe we're to enjoy friendship during it's prime, then as it fades, simply move on. Could this be what she sees in me? A fading friendship?

What is friendship? Is there such thing as "ethics of friendship"?

I've always admired the martial artist prototype. Behind their deadly fighting, they are cool, humble, and reflective people. This prototype inspired in me a vision of unbreakable friendship. It made me dream of relationships full of dignity and respect where the word awkward doesn't exist.

But when I'm no longer isolated with my thoughts, when I'm actually with her, all my carefully contemplated ideas crumble.

Sometimes I feel underground resentment between us. Where did this terrible feeling come from. Could it have stemmed from failed expectations? What kind of reasoning is this- to resent another for not being perfect?

Or maybe our expectations towards each other are illustrate our different ethics. Ethics. The study of values- good and bad, right and wrong. Is there such thing as ethics of friendship?

Where did these fuzy feelings come from?